What should a writer do with their memories?
Write what you know.
Last week, I took that phrase and defined it as not just the life you’ve lived but also how that life has influenced your perspective. That influence can come through events and emotions you’ve experienced, people you’ve known, and lessons you’ve learned. If you haven’t yet, check out the writing exercises in that post as you explore how the past has shaped what you know of the world around you.
This week, I want to take the next step and talk about several ways to translate real life experiences into fiction. I don’t mean to imply your own life is the only place to find inspiration for your writing—it’s fine to “write what you know” in terms of worldview and emotions without drawing directly from your own experiences. While you don’t have to draw directly from your memories to write what you know, however, it can do a lot to help your stories ring true. It’s as easy as practicing using the little things, using the big things, and recognizing which things not to use—or to use with caution.
Using the Little Things
Sometimes, the littlest things stand out to you the most. It might not be the Big Thing that happened to you or someone you knew—it might simply be that moment at the grocery store when you saw a really weird fruit you just had to try, or maybe that feeling from stepping in a puddle on the kitchen floor when you just put on new socks. These are the details that make life life, and they’re the details that will bring life to your story.
Consider collecting these details in a journal. I don’t necessarily mean a comprehensive daily journal, which is something I’ve tried and failed. When I tried to write down all the details of my days, I burned out and couldn’t keep it up. Now I just journal when I have a purpose, writing my way through specific life goals or recording moments I don’t want to forget.
Why not try keeping a journal of little moments you’d like to remember? In a physical book, you can note the tiny moments that caught your notice, the things that made you laugh or feel surprised, and the little jokes or turns of phrase that you don’t want to forget. Alternately, in a folder on your computer, you can collect links to pictures, articles, and social media snippets that you found memorable. Do what seems most natural for natural for you.
Once you have those moments, there are two ways to use them. One is to use the little things as direct inspiration—when you go back and look at them, what kind of story do they spark in your mind? What new places do they take your characters? Let little details spark big stories in your imagination.
Another way is to keep your journal or list close at hand at all times. That way, when you’re working on a novel or short story, you can draw on those details to flesh out specific scenes or moments. Use them to color the people, places, and events in your work in a richer, truer-to-life form.
Using the Big Things
Sometimes, it’s appropriate to move beyond the little details and incorporate the actual events we’ve experienced, or the people or places that were part of them. We’ve all been on emotional journeys (if not physical ones), and many times, we want to express them through our fiction. So what does that actually look like?
Assuming you’re writing fiction, not a factual memoir, I recommend using one of two “what if” methods. These are things I’ve done in my own writing, and not only are they fun, they’ve brought about some of my favorite stories.
The first “what if” method is daydreaming. Have you ever mentally played out scenes from your life that never actually happened? I do this all the time. I picture conversations that might have happened if I’d have been thinking more quickly, or I imagine futures that probably won’t ever happen but aren’t technically impossible. Instead of dismissing these scenes, use them on purpose. Learn from them and create stories that come from the almost-but-not-quite.
The other “what if” method is changing the details. What if the conversation you had with your mom was actually a conversation between a student and teacher? What if the tough time you and your siblings went through happened to a family living in another time period or another universe? When you change details like setting or character, a scene that had one outcome in real life might lead to an entirely different, engaging story in a fictional context.
What Not to Use
When you’re writing from life, there are a few things you don’t want to do. These things are easy to overlook and require a look outwards, not just inwards. Let’s take a look at the two big ones:
First, try not to use identifiable details that would hurt someone else. The ethics of writing from your life is a big topic, one that comes up a lot as people try to honestly tell their own story without encroaching on someone else’s. While there are a lot of perspectives on this issue, here’s a way you probably can’t go wrong: if readers would (a) recognize an incident as true and (b) identify someone else who is portrayed in a negative or embarrassing light, think twice before putting it straight into your story. Change the details or make sure that nobody would recognize it (or get permission!).
Second, try not to use fiction as an emotional dumping ground if you intend to publish it. I’ve seen stories that started as therapeutic writing for their authors, but those stories went through a lot of changes before the final version. If you’re writing to get everything out on paper, I recommend first writing out the whole story in the form of personal essay, private stories, memoir, or even journal-style—whatever it takes to write for you. After you’ve had a chance to process a little, go back through and sort out the parts that you actually want to share with others. You’ll get to work through what you want to work through, and then you’ll be able to come back to it with a more honest perspective.
Reimagined Truth
A story that draws from reality in an honest way is more likely to feel like reality in turn. As you write, think about the what-ifs from your own life and how those have sparked your creativity. What if there were a character who had to learn a lesson you’ve learned? What if the strange things you’ve seen snuck into your scenes? Then, fill in your stories with the little details that make life the complicated, surprising thing it is, whether it’s the actual things you’ve experienced or new things those experiences have inspired.
In the end, remember to let your imagination take those snippets of reality anywhere it wants to go. When you sit down to “write what you know,” don’t let that goal stop you from writing about whatever settings, characters, and problems you dream of. You know life, and if you can use that knowledge to grant your fictional characters that same life, you will have succeeded at something that it takes many people years to learn.
Found interesting; and useful.